It’s a choice to be in relationship with someone.
It’s a choice to settle for everything they say—or not.
It’s a choice to believe everything they claim is correct—or not.
When I think about my father, I hear assumptions from people: “Well, your mom wasn’t communicating with him, so what could he do?”
But stop assuming that.
Circumstances may have kept them from being together as a couple, but they didn’t have to be together for him to be a father. My mom could have said:
She is still your child. You can still care for her. You can still visit her, and she can visit you. You can introduce her to her grandmother, her brother, her sister, her aunties, her cousins—so she can have them in her life.
That’s what love does. Love makes room. Love doesn’t shrink down into excuses—it stretches wide with compassion and understanding.
Because God is love.
And fatherhood, just like marriage, is a choice. You choose to step into that role. You choose to stay. You choose to show up.
So don’t say “God gave me to you” as if that excuses absence. God did give me life, but He never gave me to neglect. He never gave me to abandonment. He gave me to love.
And here’s the truth that heals me even in the ache:
God loves me.
God forgives me.
God holds me.
Even when others choose absence, He chooses presence.
Even when people let go, He never releases His grip.
“Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me.”
—Psalm 27:10
So I grieve, but I also grow.
I hurt, but I also heal.
Because my identity was never anchored in a man’s choice—it has always been secure in God’s.
Devo for my heart 